I thought I’d mix things up a bit today and link up with Kelly’s Korner Blog for S.U.Y.L. Today’s topic is about sharing marriage advice and there have been some pretty insightful entries so far. You can head over there and check some of them out…you just might learn something! I really liked Kelly’s own entry and how she said that what women most need is to feel loved and what men most need is to feel respected (Ephesians 5:33). I think that holds very true.
Matt and I have only been married for (almost) 5 years, so we’re probably not in much of a position to be doling out marriage advice, but regardless, I have definitely learned a few things during these 5 years. Unlike a lot of “newlyweds” our first few years were actually pretty hectic and nontraditional. Besides all the usual changes that come with marriage, we completely uprooted our lives and moved to Alabama (my first time living more than an hour from home EVER). I started law school, which has been just as much of a sacrifice on Matt as on me. We’ve faced a lot of other challenges and bumps in the road, particularly over the past couple of years. I’ll just say that it hasn’t be all easy peasy like I had always imagined it would be. Everyone always told me growing up how you have to work at marriage, and I just took that with a grain of salt believing that a good marriage will be easy and fun and perfect all the time. Umm, no. Marriage does take work. Once I was finally able to admit that, I was more than willing to make the effort. I think that is sometimes the hardest part…admitting that no marriage is perfect, but it can be successful if you work at it. Some other things I have learned thus far…
1. Accept differences and let the little things go (this is hard for me to do, but I’m working at it!)
2. Say I love you often
3. Show it even more often
4. Have activities that you like to do together
5. Also have activities that you do yourself (have some personal time)
6. Pray together
7. Also take time everyday to ask God to help you personally be a better spouse. I ask God every single morning to help me be a good wife to Matt and to show me what his needs are and how I can support those.
8. Regular date nights
9. Communicate your needs and feelings (this is something I really struggle with, but when I do it, it makes all the difference).
10. And finally…Laugh together. A lot.
What kind of tips and advice have you learned?