Motherhood Monday {on finding balance}

It’s been forever since I’ve done a Motherhood Monday post.  I was just looking through my “Notes” section of my iPhone, where I keep a lot of my writing ideas, and I have several topics listed that I do want to write about at some point, but I just can’t seem to find the motivation to delve in to them.  I have all these thoughts running through my head, and it should be so easy to just put the pen to the paper (or the fingers to the keyboard), yet it often seems like an impossible task.  Writing/blogging is so cathartic for me…it really does me good.  I just need to stop making the typical I’m-so-busy-I-can-hardly-breath excuse and just make the time.  Yes I am busy, but Lord knows I find enough time to waste on silly things like Google’ing “Why does my dog’s breath smell like dead fish” and “Yellow slipcovered ottoman” (actual things in my browsing history from earlier today), and spending way too much time browsing the Pottery Barn website and putting things in my Shopping Cart that I obviously can’t afford, and just generally being sucked in to the oblivious hole that is the Internet.  I probably spent five hours this weekend doing mindless Internet surfing.  So unproductive – I know.  And I wonder why my child’s eyes light up whenever the iPad comes in to his view.

Any-who.  One of my own personal goals for 2015 has been to slow down, stress less and live more simple, and while some days I feel like I’m doing a pretty good job at these things, other days I feel like I am running in a million different directions, worrying way too much about things I can’t control, and feeling the need to have things I really don’t need (see my comment above about the $5,400(!!) Shopping Cart I have going on at potterybarn.com right now).  How does one find balance in a world of go-go-go, now-now-now, faster-faster-faster, more-more-more?  It’s a struggle.

I have learned a few things that have helped me on this quest.  For one, I am saying NO more often.  I’m definitely a people pleaser and I’ve always struggled with saying no to people, especially if I think I’m going to let someone down, or miss out on something important.  It’s exhausting being a people pleaser…let me tell you.  I do feel like having a kid has made this easier.  A lot of things just aren’t possible to attend or participate in when you have a toddler.  I hate using the term the “Kid Card,” but I will say I pull it a lot, mainly out of necessity, not because I’m making up excuses.  Plus, I like spending time with my kid.  I’d choose it just about over anything.  So it’s not that I’m being dishonest or making lame excuses when I say I can’t volunteer at that event or serve on that committee.  It’s because I want to spend that time with my family.

We’ve also started budgeting, like for real budgeting, with a spreadsheet and formulas and daily accountability.  Matt (affectionately?) calls me the Bank Account Nazi.  I have probably gotten a little carried away, but you know what?  We are paying stuff off, spending way less, saving way more, giving more to church and still having some fun.  So I like to think it’s working, even if he gives me the stink eye every time I ask him what he spent that $1.25 on;)

As for stressing less, this is a constant work in progress.  Usually it’s job related, and that’s just not changing anytime soon, so I’m learning to prioritize my time better and get as much done during the normal work hours as I can, and then leave whatever I can’t get done for the next day…meaning, leave it at the office and not bring it home, physically or mentally.  I’ve also realized that if I try and have a more grateful heart, it changes my perspective a lot.  No doubt about it I am blessed in the career arena.  I have a good job, I work for a great company, and we have a lot of perks (hello amazing trip to Park City that we just returned from).  I also have some awesome co-workers that are also dear friends.  I’m for sure blessed by my job, and I need to remember that when the going gets tough.

In fact, having a grateful heart could really be the key to all of this.  If I could change my focus from “I have so much to be stressed about” to “I have some much to be grateful for” it would probably make all the difference.  What’s that quote?  Too blessed to be stressed.  Kind of corny, but so very true.

Now that I’ve totally rambled on and ended up blogging about something entirely different than what I had intended to write about (our weekend, which really wasn’t all that exciting anyways), I guess I will sign off and go take a long bath, which is also something I’ve been doing to relax.  Anyone have some tips for how they slow down, de-stress and live more simply?  I’m always looking for more tricks.

And just for some “color” to this post, a few pics from the weekend….

Looking for “fossils” with daddy at the McWane Center Saturday…

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Being silly Sunday morning and insisting on wearing his tennis shoes, but no clothes (we are going through a naked phase right now)…

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This child really does have my heart…

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